Tuesday, December 31, 2019

2019 End Of Year Report

God, this year passed so quickly I only realised it was about to end a few days ago. It honestly came as a shock; where the hell did the time go?

Old Resolutions

1. Remember to break problems down
Sure, when I have a problem that's bothering me I've generally gotten used to taking it one small step at a time, which has helped. I mean, I don't always remember to do so, but I think I've gotten better at it. So I guess I can mark this one as a success overall.

2. Center myself regularly
Umm... I haven't been doing this as "regularly" as I should have. I do remember to try at times, but it needs more work.

3. Exercise more
I've been trying. And failing.

4. Eat Better
Pretty sure I've regressed on this front. I've just... not been able to find the time or focus to care about my diet as much as I want to, not even as much I have been in the previous few years.

New Resolutions
So lately I've been feeling even less organised than before. I think one issue is my energy and motivation levels are low. I'm also finding it really hard to start tasks, and I think one reason is that I always feel stressed so I never feel like I have time for anything so I never feel like I can afford to start anything, and instead I just... sit around wasting time on youtube. It's stupid and just makes things worse.

But I'm thinking one thing that I need to do that could really help if I get used to it is setting actual plans, with specific timeslots and that sort of thing. I'm thinking the to-do lists I've been trying to use aren't enough; I tend to approach things too "softly": like, I say "I'll do X after I finish Y, then I'll do Z", but I go so slowly doing Y that it's so late that I don't have much time for X and I realise I have no chance of doing Z. Then I feel stressed and depressed about not finishing.

So maybe if I start writing up my daily to-do lists as actual timetables, eventually I might get used to allocating my time effectively and using it efficiently. So I think that will be my resolution for 2020:

1. Plan my time more accurately and rigidly
I want to do this on the small scale, writing up timetables each day for that day, and being more strict on myself in following them.

I don't want to backslide on my previous resolutions, but I think I need to prioritise this so I'm going to leave it as my only new years resolution this year. Obviously that doesn't mean I wont try to make progress in other areas, but this one needs to stay at the forefront.

God I feel old.

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